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Intro

As a young mom that didn’t really fit in with other moms, I had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that my daughter, Little M, would just have to deal with having a hot mess mom. What is a hot mess mom you ask? Well let me explain.. I am always late, messy bun, kids hair not brushed, and I guarantee her socks don’t match. I am the mom that is sobbing in the grocery store because she can’t keep her emotions in check, and the mom that bribes her daughter with jellybeans. I will never be the mom that brings cute healthy snacks for the whole class, I will probably just stop for donuts on my way mainly because I forgot. I curse too much, drink too much and am teaching Little M to be just as sassy as I am.

We might not ever figure life out, but at least we can document our story.

Forever and for always,

BHOT MESS MOM

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To my Daughter’s Father….

When we found out we were expecting, we were both tremendously freaked out. Scared, worried, and filled with doubt, we set out on a new adventure.

Since that day, we have been parents to a beautiful, smart, amazing, sassy little girl.

There are times where we want to rip each others hair out, and I sometimes want to knock you upside the head. We definitely don’t agree on everything, and we fought more than I wanted to. However, I will forever be grateful for you.

Because of you, I have the greatest gift that anyone could possibly ask for. I get to experience the love of a lifetime. My life has so much more meaning and purpose because of you.

I get to look at life the gift it truly is and cherish every moment, because we all know how quickly they go. I am able to see the world not only through my eyes, but through the curious eyes of an adventurous little beauty as well. Eyes that are so naive, eyes that only see innocence and good in the world

Because of you I get the joy of arguing with a mini version of myself. As trying as that can be, I have learned patience and understanding.

I get the world’s best bear hugs, and the cutest butterfly kisses. I get the most perfectly timed “I love you’s”.

While yes, I can go out and have a child with anyone, none will ever be the same exact child I have now. We created this awesome, unique, perfect little girl together.

Because of you I am a mother, and for that I could never thank you enough…

 

 

The Great Fall

The other day Little M and I visited my best friend for dinner as we do almost every week. On our way home it starts pouring. If you know Washington, you know that this rain is normal. However, this specific day, I had completely forgotten a jacket with a hood for both of us ( I told you I was a mess). I also had to carry in some groceries I had stopped for, and my gym bag.

We park and I prepare myself, multiple bags on each arm, gym bag and purse strapped across my chest, and Little M’s hand barely holding on. I try to rush her into our apartment as it is pouring and freezing, but she is enjoying the rain. Dancing, and just moseying along. I look back, to try to hustle her along, and CRASH! My foot had slipped off the edge of the curb and I was face down in a puddle.

While my knees and elbows hurt, my pride hurt worse. Here I am, soaking wet, sitting on the edge of the curb, ready to give up on life, when Little M pipes up with, ” And that’s why we don’t run!”

While in the moment this made me furious, looking back it makes me chuckle, and kind of relates to life. Sometimes you have to fall in order to get yourself to stop and dance in the rain. Its the little things that truly matter.

Forever and For Always,
B